Court is a sketch that appears in "Spam," the twenty-fifth episode of Monty Python's Flying Circus.
Synopsis[]
A bailiff (Eric Idle) calls "Alexander Yahlt" and an offscreen chorus sings "Call Alexander Yahlt" in harmony. The magistrate (Terry Jones) says "Oh shut up!", causing the chorus to stop.
The bailiff turns to Yahlt (Michael Palin) and accuses him of "publishing an alleged English-Hungarian phrase book with intent to cause a breach of the peace". Yahlt pleads not guilty and the bailiff asks him questions about his live, to which Yahlt replies in full sentences. He asks "you did say 46 Horton Terrace?" and Yahlt says "yes". The bailiff produces a gong and strikes it in victory explaining "ah! Got him" and the lawyer and policeman (John Cleese and Graham Chapman) clap in amusement.
The bailiff reads excerpts from the book, including "can you direct me to the station" translating into "please fondle my bum." Yahlt pleads incompetence and the policeman asks for an adjournment and the judge says no. Embarrassed, he releases a long fart and the magistrate asks why he didn't tell them why he wanted one, and the policeman responds he didn't know an acceptable legal phrase.
The bailiff calls for Abigail Tesler, and the lawyer stands by a large advertising poster of her posing with underwear. The lawyer begins to advertise her as if she's on a dating show. Then, the magistrate has turned into an advert and a voiceover describes his life, and then the lawyer.
And Now for Something Completely Different[]
The excerpt the bailiff reads from the book is "can you direct me to the railway station?", translating into "please fondle my buttocks." It cuts to a scene with a man (Graham Chapman) waiting by a bus stop. Another Hungarian man (Terry Jones) comes up to him and asks him "please fondle my buttocks" and the man gives clear directions.
Trivia[]
- The "gonging" in court of phrasebook publisher Alexander Yahlt by the prosecutor is a reference to a British game show in the '60s, "Open the Box." In one segment of the show, contestants had only to go 60 seconds without answering "yes" or "no" to questions by the host to win a prize. Some of the questions were designed to trick contestants into answering "yes" or "no" — similarly to the prosecutor's "You did say 46 Horton Terrace, did you?" — and if they did, they were "gonged."'
- After the policeman (Graham Chapman) asks for an adjournment, he emits a huge burst of flatulence, whereupon the other cast members (particularly John Cleese and Terry Jones) can barely contain their laughter. This is an example of "corpsing", or breaking character.
- When Alexander Yahlt (Michael Palin) is first addressed in court, he replies "Oh, I am' and the court clerk tells him to stop the impersonations, after which the rest of Yahlt's lines are normal. Initially Palin was impersonating character actor Derek Nimmo.