Synopsis[edit | edit source]
A girl wearing a white dress with long hair (Carol Cleveland) sits on a chair in the middle of a rubbish dump. Seagulls squawk noisily.
Stig (Terry Jones) walks up to her awkwardly and the two converse in French, giving vague answers. Stig starts to hum the French national anthem, but changes the subject, spotting a cabbage the girl has on her lap. The two laugh awkwardly.
A film critic Phil Jenkinson (Eric Idle) explains that was Brian Distel and Brianette Zatapathique in an improvised scene from a new movie, Le Fromage Grand. He states the symbolism of the "breakdown in communication in our modern society". He goes on to explain how the director demonstrates underlying violence in the society when Brian and Brianette meet on another rubbish dump.
It cuts to the rubbish dump where Brianette sits, a swarm of seagulls behind her. Brian greets her and points out the lettuce she holds. Sparse conversation continues with random shots of protests and war scenes cut in the places (including a scene with a man (John Cleese) hitting another man (Michael Palin) on the head with a club, a pianist (Graham Chapman) getting the piano lid slammed on his fingers and more scenes of characters subtly hurting each other).
The two start laughing randomly. The girl says "j'taime" and Stig replies. She holds out the lettuce and it explodes.
The film critic analyses the lettuce, and how capable it is of destroying humanity. He then introduces Chris Conger, who took the BBC film unit to the filming location of Twentieth-Century Vole's newest epic, Scott of the Antarctic.